Top Ten Cheeziest Videos of the 80s
Below are the lists of submissions to the site....
This page currently edited by: Sylence. Past editor: Junior
By: Ryan
- 10. Like a prayer by Madonna
Good song,good video,good looking girl,GOOD GOD!!!
- 9. Heart And Soul by Huey Lewis And The News
I love this video,it's funny when you see the short guy dancing with the tall girl..
- 8. Head over heels by GoGos
This video ws very colorful and its the perfect pop song.
- 7. Like A Virgin by Madonna
Sexy is all I can say!!!
- 6. Karma Chamleon by Culture Club
This video was really fun to watch ad it made me enjoy listening to Culture Club more. I love the bizarre hair George has...
- 5. Wake Me Up Before You Go Go by WHAM!
OK...This video was kinda ummmm flamboyant with the shorts and the pinks and yellows, but I liked it...fun to dance to.
- 4. Raspberry Beret by Prince
I always wanted that cloud suit he wore in the video...very, very unique.
- 3. She Bop by Cyndi Lauper
This song is one of m favortes..Cyndi Lauper is not just a singer, she's and entertainer.
- 2. Love Is A Battlefeild by Pat Benatar
I watched this video over an over again and I love it soooo much.
- 1. Lucky Star by Madonna
What can I say...she looks great and her dancing is spectacular.
By: Ben
- 10. The Twist by The Fat Boys & Chubby Checker
Whoever allowed this to happen? Does Chubby Checker have no shame? Did we really need to see the Fat Boys doing the Twist? What did the world do to receive such punishment?!?
- 9. Who's That Girl? by Madonna
Aside from showing scenes of the awful movie of the same name, a happy Madonna meets and dances with a couple people on a really cheap-looking set, goes to a cheap-looking gypsy store, meets a surly gypsy woman, and then opens a box which shows (behold!) a cheezy, happy cartoon incarnation of herself. No wonder her next video was "Like A Prayer".
- 8. Heaven Is A Place On Earth by Belinda Carlisle
Whoever thought having Belinda in a video with a bunch of kids carrying glowing globes (and looking like rejects to play Batman Jr.) was a good idea was taking some serious drugs.
- 7. Everlasting Love by Howard Jones
A love tale about two mummies in modern-day London...what the ?!?
- 6. Hello by Lionel Ritchie
This video is cheezy and creepy at the same time...a man with an enormously large head following a blind girl around school. Near the end, he calls her number...pauses and waits 10 seconds and then goes, "Hello? Is it me you're looking for?"...but then he puts the phone down! And the statue she makes of his head. Yikes.
- 5. Shake Your Love by Debbie Gibson
Although every Debbie Gibson video qualifies in this category, I picked just one. Debbie looking bad-ass wearing a leather jacket in a convertable, then merrily dancing a Paula Abdul-choreographed routine with a bunch of other lame-o's. The director of this video needs to be sent to the desert with no water.
- 4. When The Children Cry by White Lion
This video makes "Luka" look like a party. Shot in blue light, it has 4 glam-rock guys sitting around a playground, interspersed with shots of kids' faces. This one's painful to watch.
- 3. Doctor Doctor by Thompson Twins
What does pairs figure skating have to do with a New Wave song anyway? And what's with the 3rd Twin (the guy with the braids) over-emoting each time they sing "can't you see I'm buuuuuurn-iiiing...."?!? Bad. Bad. Bad.
- 2. Diamonds by Herb Alpert feat. Janet Jackson
A gawd-awful disco video...starting with two dorky DJ's overlooking the dancefloor. Herb Alpert's holding a counter as people come into the club...people dance the snake and other lurid 80's club line dances. Then you think you're going to see Janet Jackson appear...you see her boots, you see her silhouette, but she punches out of the wall and she's a little girl lip-syncing. Clever. Not.
- 1. Lost In Emotion by Lisa Lisa & Cult Jam
Take a cheezy pop song and put it in a carnival setting...check out Lisa's waist-high zipper pants! Check out the mass crowd cheezily dancing along! Check out her band members with geri curls! Get your nachos with extra queso right here.
By: silver
- 10. Video Killed The Radio Star by The Buggles
1st song on mtv, followed by many others that sucked.
- 9. You Might Think by The Cars
And this was supossed to be a big budget video?
- 8. Goody Goody Two Shoes by Adam Ant
The girl is hot, but Adam in that Euro-Mexican-drag get up is too much. Is his face panted like a football player or Native American or both. Just creepy.
- 7. Relax by Frankie Goes To Hollywood
We all know this one, I've been to Hollywood, and Frankie better keet his buns out of there. He's still a wanted man for this bad video.
- 6. Time by Culture Club
I'd rather get teeth pulled the watch this.
- 5. Back For More by Ratt
Looks like dead rats on singer's head, even a guest shot from Uncle Milty couldn't help this suck fest.
- 4. Money For nothing by Dire Straits
I once saw this video seven times in 4 hours on mtv. What started out cool, was played so much it sucks today.
- 3. See You In Hell by grim reapper
some ero band sold their souls to get this one made. the guy who goes riding his hog through a stain glass window at the end, was badly hurt and sued the band.
- 2. braken the law by judas preast
my fav band a good song, but robbing a jewlery store at gutiar point will only get you on my suck list. mostly thay just drive around and look mean. rob halford does a good job at lip sinking. this was the video that brought the band out of the closet. to bad thay didnt stay in there
- 1. im still standing by elton john
the song that says im the biggest homo on the planet and in case you live in a cave and didnt know, i'll make a video to show you im gay. after seeing this video too many times i belive elton is strait, its all just an act to sale records. and to think he has orgys with the freaks in the video.
wow the super suck videos
By: Gary
- 10. Video Killed The Radio Star by The Buggles
Ooooo...check out those special effects! Sodavision..aahhhhh! And look at that chubby guy at the end of the video. Did you see the look of bliss on his face? Yeah, I bet all he goes for is sodas.
- 9. You Might Think by The Cars
And this was supossed to be a big budget video?
- 8. Goody Goody Two Shoes by Adam Ant
The girl is hot, but Adam in that Euro-Mexican-drag get up is too much. Is his face panted like a football player or Native American or both. Just creepy.
- 7. Relax by Frankie Goes To Hollywood
We all know this one, I've been to Hollywood, and Frankie better keet his buns out of there. He's still a wanted man for this bad video.
- 6. Time by Culture Club
I'd rather get teeth pulled the watch this.
- 5. Back For More by Ratt
Looks like dead rats on singer's head, even a guest shot from Uncle Milty couldn't help this suck fest.
- 4. Money For nothing by Dire Straits
I once saw this video seven times in 4 hours on mtv. What started out cool, was played so much it sucks today.
- 3. See You In Hell by Grim Reaper
Phillip Michael Thomas. Good lord, man! What were you thinking?! I wonder what this former star of Miami Vice is doing now. "Welcome to Burger King, can I take your order?"
- 2. Leave It by Yes
My fav band a good song, but robbing a jewlery store at guitar point will only get you on my suck list. Mostly thay just drive around and look mean. Rob Halford does a good job at lip synching. This was the video that brought the band out of the closet. Too bad thay didn't stay in there.
- 1. Naughty Girls Need Love Too by Samantha Fox
Naughty girls need a good dye job!
Best 80s videos: "Cloudbusting"- Kate Bush, "Beatbox"- Art of Noise, "Don't Answer Me"- Alan Parsons Project.
By: Gary
- 10. Go For A Soda by Kim Mitchell
Ooooo...check out those special effects! Sodavision..aahhhhh! And look at that chubby guy at the end of the video. Did you see the look of bliss on his face? Yeah, I bet all he goes for is sodas.
- 9. Der Kommisar by Falco
Looks like it was made at a community access TV station with a 6 year old in the control room.
- 8. Da Da Da by Trio
What is this...a Mentos commercial?
- 7. Funky Town by Pseudo Echo
Easily the most boring video I have ever seen.
- 6. The Reflex by Duran Duran
Really not a bad song/video. Too bad every channel on earth had to play it three million times a day.
- 5. Ca Plane Pour Moi by Plastic Bertrand
HOLY CRAP!!! Does this guy live on coffee and speed?
- 4. Walkin' In The Rain by Oran Juice Jones
I really have to laugh when he gives his honey the heave-ho at the end. Yeah, you tell 'er, Oran!
- 3. Just The Way I Planned It by Philip Michael Thomas
Good lord, man! What were you thinking?! I wonder what this former star of Miami Vice is doing now. "Welcome to Burger King, can I take your order?"
- 2. Leave It by Yes
I get a headache every time I see this.
- 1. Naughty Girls Need Love Too by Samantha Fox
Naughty girls need a good dye job!
Best 80s videos: "Cloudbusting"- Kate Bush, "Beatbox"- Art of Noise, "Don't Answer Me"- Alan Parsons Project.
By: dee
- 10. Unskinny Bop by Poison
I got some rat poison for them!!
- 9. We Built This City by Jefferson Starship
- 8. Sledgehammer by Peter Gabriel
Quite possibly the ugliest video ever! Any video with dancing raw meat should be questioned!
- 7. Straight Up by Paula Abdul
Paula Abdul + cheezy tapdancing = bad policy!
- 6. In The Still Of The Night by Whitesnake
Hey, it's Whitesnake.
- 5. Boys Of Summer by Don Henley
Don't know why, I just HATE this one. Oh yeah, it's unbelievably BORING!
- 4. Welcome To The Jungle by Guns 'N' Roses
Just too funny with scrawny 120lb Axl Rose telling us "welcome to the jungle, baby, youre gonna die!" right.
- 3. Wake Me Up Before You Go Go by Wham!
- 2. Round And Round by Ratt
Hey, it's Ratt!
- 1. Kiss Me Deadly by Lita Ford
The song is bad enough..."went to a party last Saturday night, I didn't get laid, I got in a fight uh huh, it ain't no big thing"...that crap has no need for a video!
This is a great site, I've been reading and laughing for the last hour.
By: Patrick
- 10. Paranomia by Art of Noise feat. Max Hedroom
Max Hedroom! The king of Cheezy 80's. I remember seeing him on square one television.
- 9. Safety Dance by Men Without Hats
Someone told me this was about virginity. That dwarf really does promote that I guess.
- 8. Land of Confusion by Genesis
When I try to explain this video to my frends I just call it "The one with all the Reagans" this is possibly one of the most intellegent videos ever filmed with puppets. The We Are The World spoof is brilliant. It's always fun to watch. Still, it uses puppets so it has to be cheezy.
- 7. True Faith by New Order
What's not to like. A couple guys in trashbags slapping each other, A turtle with sign language and calastenics.
- 6. Land Down Under by Men at work
This video is worth it just to see Men at Work's acting ability. The Man from Brussels, The real estate agent, the strange lady, the den in bombay, and of course the Koala on a String. Classic.
- 5. Take a Chance on Me by Erasure
At first you think it is abba until you realize, "Wait a minute. That isn't Abba. It's Erasure in drag pretending to be Abba." Another rather scary video.
- 4. Go West by Pet Shop Boys
I know the significance and everything, but this is a pretty dated Video. We see how far computer animation had to come with the animated star traveling all the way over from the U.S.S.R. to new york to find a bunch of militant boys with weird hats in tight white pants that accent their "Package". The song isn't that well written and is pretty trite. But At least it doesn't have the same cliches as most 80's videos, except for the strange hats.
- 3. Mexican Radio by Wall of Voodoo
Have you ever realized how many increddibly scary 80's videos there were. What is up with the guy's lip, and what is up with the bull and the guy's head in the beans? Really Disturbing.
- 2. Sunday Bloody Sunday (Red Rocks Version) by U2
This reminds you of the 80s like crazy. The pants the leather jacket the footage of Redrocks the classic "This is not a rebel song" intro. Good song though.
- 1. Putting on the Ritz by Taco
This is possibly one of the most frightening videos ever made. It's a guy that looks frighteningly close to the girls in the Robert Palmer videos dancing around in the slums with lightup cane around a bunch of homeless people, then just for the heck of it the fade to a picture of Gary Cooper. Question, who's Idea was it to Cover a old pop standard? I don't know, this video is really scary.
By: chris
- 10. Money For Nothing by Dire Straights
The best video ever! MTV has these guys to thank for helping them get on the map, the animation is great mixed with the regular stuff.
- 9. Time After Time by Cyndi Lauper
The video is great and Lauper does a great job with the song. Has a lot of meaning to it! I sing it to my wife all the time!
- 8. Jump by Van Halen
As long ad David Lee Roth is singing it! Jump is the the all time 80's party hit!
- 7. Ill Never Let You Go by Steelheart
Maybe a one hit wonder, but dang, this guy could belt out the lyrics to this one and it was a true 80's Power Ballad.
- 6. Bad to the Bone by George Thorogood
Another Party favorite. This one is blues,jazz,rock all mixed together! And is one of the best videos too!
- 5. Down Under by Men at Work
Actually any song by this groups was great! They were a true 80's Band!
- 4. Another Brick in the Wall by Pink Flyod
Every school kid's favorite!!! We got in trouble for playing it at our senior assembly!
- 3. Crazy Train by Ozzy
One of Ozzy's greatest hits. This one still gets everyone playing the air gutiar at parties. Long Live the memory of Randy Rhodes!
- 2. One by Metallica
One of the best videos of the 80's. And well written. The lyrics mean something and the video tells a story!
- 1. Sister Christian by Night Ranger
This has to be every brother's song to his sister. They covered everything that a big brother would do to look out for his little sissy.
By: alex robert
- 10. I Drove All Night by Cyndi Lauper
cyndi naked? i'm there.
- 9. Hole In My Heart All The Way To China by Cyndi Lauper
you can't go wrong with a zillion china men behind you in a conga line. this girl knows what she's doing.
- 8. Change Of Heart by Cyndi Lauper
i can't resist a woman wearing a baby doll outfit.
- 7. True Colors by Cyndi Lauper
if only for the chandelier cyndi is wearing on her head. that must be a pain to clean.
- 6. Goonies R Good Enough Part 2 by Cyndi Lauper
if only for cyndi's mother's performance as the sea hag. she reminded me of my own sweet mum.
- 5. Goonies R Good Enough Part 1 by Cyndi Lauper
it makes me feel like i'm good enough. yes, i'm a goonie.
- 4. Money Changes Everything by Cyndi Lauper
i sing this every morning in front of my bathroom mirror; naked.
- 3. She Bop by Cyndi Lauper
i have to bop myself everytime i see it.
- 2. Time After Time by Cyndi Lauper
i cry everytime i see it.
- 1. Girls Just Want To Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper
one of the greatest videos of all time, and done on a shoestring budget.
numbers 11 to 20 are blue angel with cyndi lauper videos.
By: Arryanna
- 10. Didn't Ya Kill My Brother by Alexie Sayle
Now I'm really surprised that this is up on this site ... it'sa stupenous video and shows that anyone can laugh at themselves.
- 9. Touch Me by Samantha Fox
Now pure cheese but I can see why people would buy into her music and wanna have her up on their walls. She still looks good too. But next time ... get a decent bloody director.
- 8. Cosmetics by Gowan
Silly video with "alien" girls drooling all over a wise and wonderfully talented Mr. Lawrence "Call me Larry" Gowan. So he can play piano ... wow! Neato! Strange Animal is better and so is Criminal Mind ;)
- 7. Rock You/Gimme Good Lovin' by Helix
Oh look! T and A! Hey at least they're Canadian product. And can rock.
- 6. People Are People by Depeche Mode
My hasn't Mr. David Gahn gotten better looking over the years (like Mr. Rhodes of Duran Duran ... only Nick's still better looking :P)). Martin's the cutest in the vid ... but funny how time changes all things in perspective. Not a bad video :)
- 5. The Pleasure Principle by Janet Jackson
The jump off the amp says it all ... as per the rest of the video ... it's decent.
- 4. Lucky Star by Madonna
Ah ... Madonna, her brother Chris and someone else. Tons of make-up, tons of black, tons of dancing, tons of strange jewellery and tons of bouncing. And now look what's happened to Madonna ... skinny and boring ... not in the least bit fun. Well it was nive to have her for role model when I was young and she was funner at the time :)
- 3. Physical by Olivia Newton-John
Just what the world needs ... SCANTILY CLAD MEN! Well at least for a while ...
- 2. Cyndi Lauper by She Bop
A woman writes "a song" about masturbation. Wow ... and staions both TV and radio ban it. No frontal nudity, no boring mysogenistic ideals ... and it gets banned. Funny ... they didn't really do that with The Divinyls "I Touch Myself". Oh well!
- 1. Union of The Snake by Duran Duran
Fastastic lighting with Roger and John Taylor (neither being related) lookinf fab but Simon ... oh dear sweet Simon ... your poor sense of fashion in the video just screams fromage ... next time wear black or no clothes at all. At least Simon makes up for his horrid sense of dressing with the cute little boy who gets him out of wherever it was. And as per Andy who plays one of the dark guys and Nick (with his map) ... terrific. Love the gothic kiddies in the video although I also dig all those guys jumping on each other (and I don't mean the members of Duran Duran!).
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