Ten Criteria for the Perfect 80's Music Video, Groups Beginning with B

Compiled mostly by Chris Pyhtila with the help of Andy Pachmayer, Chris Burger, and Aaron Fynewever

Further commentary added by ChuckyG and various web visitors...

This page currently edited by: Rio Rhodes. Past editor: Rock 'n' Roll Fan

The Original Criteria

  1. At least one babe
  2. Poofy hair
  3. Torn clothing
  4. Cheesy keyboards
  5. At least one change of clothing
  6. Stage effects (smoke, lasers, etc.) or visual effects (artist jumping through a TV, disappearing, etc.)
  7. Wild instrumental or record scratch solo
  8. A storyline
  9. A cool car (although any kind of transportation is acceptable, like a plane or a car or a motorcycle)
  10. Sunglasses
Songs beginning with: [Index] [A] [B] [C] [D] [E] [F] [G] [H] [I] [J] [K] [L] [M] [N] [O] [P] [Q] [R] [S] [T] [U] [V] [W] [X] [Y] [Z] [misc]
B-52's's, "Love Shack"
  1. Babes? 2 babes...in the The band...and all the extras
  2. Poofy Hair? The gals and the blokes
  3. Torn Clothing? When theyre on the mics
  4. Cheesy Keyboards? I believe so.
  5. At Least One Change of Clothing? Yeah...the pink and then the yellow....
  6. Stage Effects? naag
  7. Wild Instrumental solo? drums
  8. Storyline? Theres a little shack where people get funky
  9. Cool Automobile? The chrystler...as big as a whale...its apt to set sail
  10. Sunglasses? yea
Submitted by: Brianne
Bad Sistahs's, "Struggle Buggy Boogie"
  1. Babes? I can count 5: Bobina, Tina, Patina, Homey Gina, Nina and Zena.
  2. Poofy Hair? Tina has poofy-Tina Turner hair
  3. Torn Clothing? Patina's too big for her dress and so she is busting out all over!
  4. Cheesy Keyboards? the gals jump around on a giant keyboard. mmmm....
  5. At Least One Change of Clothing? Homey Gina takes off one of her many layers of baggy clothes (striptease for me baby!)
  6. Stage Effects? strobe lights
  7. Wild Instrumental solo? Homey Gina raps
  8. Storyline? VH1 Behind the Music
  9. Cool Automobile? Struggle Buggy
  10. Sunglasses? Tina and Patina wear sunglasses
Submitted by: Cynthia Davis
Beaste Boys's, "No Sleep Till Brooklyn"
  1. Babes? The female dancer, the girls at the audience
  2. Poofy Hair? The Beastie Boys (with wigs), the groupies, etc.
  3. Torn Clothing? The "hair band stlye" clothes the Beastie Boys wore to get the gig.
  4. Cheesy Keyboards? None.
  5. At Least One Change of Clothing? The Beastie Boys' '80's hip hop clothes to hair band fashion
  6. Stage Effects? Zooms, the "explosion" at the end when they were trying to open a safe
  7. Wild Instrumental solo? The guitar solo. The video featured a gorilla playing it.
  8. Storyline? The Beastie Boys wanted to play a gig, but the owner told them that he only wants rock music. They dressed up like a hair band (like Poison, Motley Crue, etc.) and finally got the gig. And poking fun of the typical hair band video on stage, which were very popular at the time.
  9. Cool Automobile? None. Strangely, are the part of the hip hop & rock video cliche'.
  10. Sunglasses? Some of the audience members wore some.
Submitted by: Music Video Nut
Beastie Boys's, "Fight For Your Right (To Party)"
  1. Babes? A whole party full of them.
  2. Poofy Hair? Most of the "babes" had poofy hair.
  3. Torn Clothing? The nerd's clothes were torn up after they dragged him into the bathroom.
  4. Cheesy Keyboards? Not seen or heard in the video.....but I'm sure the nerd must have had one in his room! ;)
  5. At Least One Change of Clothing? Not during the vid.....but I'm sure after that pie fight EVERYONE changed clothes.
  6. Stage Effects? Wildly partying young adults and flying pies.....whate else does a video need?
  7. Wild Instrumental solo? Wild, but short, guitar solo mid-song.
  8. Storyline? Nerd's parents go out for the night. Beastie Boys & pals crash nerd's little party and basically destroy the nerd's house.
  9. Cool Automobile? None to be seen.
  10. Sunglasses? Mike D. wears them throughout the video, and I think a couple of the bikers had some on as well.
Submitted by: Lesley
Big Country's, "In a Big Country"
  1. Babes? Yeah, and she beats the crap out of the band.
  2. Poofy Hair? On the lead singer (more spiky) and the babe.
  3. Torn Clothing? Again, on the babe.
  4. Cheesy Keyboards? You don't see them, but they're there.
  5. At Least One Change of Clothing? They change into freakin' Scuba gear, work cloths, and stage clothes.
  6. Stage Effects? Burning building, flares...
  7. Wild Instrumental solo? Three words: Bagpipe Sounding Guitars
  8. Storyline? The lads are on a quest to retreive a box. Who knows what's in the box. Drugs? Gold? The holy grail? Anyway, it's obviously important, because they ride around on ATVs, go diving, and scale a cliff to get it.
  9. Cool Automobile? Pontoon boat, jetski, ATVs
  10. Sunglasses? Here's the only omission -- but the babe DOES use binoculars. I say that counts.
Submitted by: ScoopKW
Billy Idol's, "Hot in the City"
  1. Babes? Yes riding on the motorcycle with billy.
  2. Poofy Hair? Yeah kinda spiked
  3. Torn Clothing? Yes, he got a confederate flag shirt that's ripped on chest.
  4. Cheesy Keyboards? I didn't see no keyboard.
  5. At Least One Change of Clothing? Yes the one on the motorcycle part and the one when he was in the building.
  6. Stage Effects? I seen two when he punched a hole in the wall and showed his face over the town.
  7. Wild Instrumental solo? Steve Stevens guitar
  8. Storyline? Kinda he riding through new york and standing in a window yelling new york.
  9. Cool Automobile? A motorcycle
  10. Sunglasses? Yes, when he was riding the motorcyclce
Submitted by: Clay Morris
Bobby Brown's, "My Prerrogative"
  1. Babes? Many backup babes playing instruments
  2. Poofy Hair? Bobby's hair was kinda poofy!
  3. Torn Clothing? His clothes looks torn! Don't they?
  4. Cheesy Keyboards? Thoughout the whole song!!!
  5. At Least One Change of Clothing? I think there is a change in clothes...Not sure...
  6. Stage Effects? He is on the stage... The elevator he takes down to the stage is considered a special effect...
  7. Wild Instrumental solo? There's a break in the song where is talks for awhile...
  8. Storyline? He gets out of his car takes an elevator down to the stage and jams!
  9. Cool Automobile? The car skretches at the beginning...
  10. Sunglasses? Bobby is wearing sunglasses at the beginning of the video when he gets out of the car...
Submitted by: Dan
Bon Jovi's, "Lay Your Hands On Me"
  1. Babes? Plenty of babes!
  2. Poofy Hair? All of them have poofy hair... He he...
  3. Torn Clothing? Ripped jeans....
  4. Cheesy Keyboards? Hmmm.... Not cheesy... Pretty cool keyboards....
  5. At Least One Change of Clothing? Towards The End...
  6. Stage Effects? The sparks flying at the start of the main guitar riff....
  7. Wild Instrumental solo? Wild solo alright!!!
  8. Storyline? All Jovi songs are stories...
  9. Cool Automobile? Nope... Plenty of babes to ride though.. He he...
  10. Sunglasses? Jon at the start....
Submitted by: Randev
Bon Jovi's, "Living On A Prayer"
  1. Babes? Ok, like the whole audince is chicks.
  2. Poofy Hair? Umm, we're talking about Bon Jovi (the greatest Band) of course they had poofy hair, they wouldnt be bon jovi without poofy hair!
  3. Torn Clothing? Umm, yeah, like 5 changes of torn clothing.
  4. Cheesy Keyboards? Yup.
  5. At Least One Change of Clothing? Like 5
  6. Stage Effects? Yup, good effects!
  7. Wild Instrumental solo? Oh yeah, Go Richie!!
  8. Storyline? Yep, Tommy and Gina are gonna make it through the hard times.
  9. Cool Automobile? Umm, no, but they don't need it, they're bon jovi!
  10. Sunglasses? Of Course!
Submitted by: Jen
The Breakfast Club's, "Right On Track (1987)"
  1. Babes? There are three, although they are dressed as chickens.
  2. Poofy Hair? Actually, the boys are disappointingly clean cut.
  3. Torn Clothing? Again, too clean cut.
  4. Cheesy Keyboards? It has about two of these, one being played by dismembered hands, connected to the body of the instrumentalist by fluro slinkies.
  5. At Least One Change of Clothing? Geez, these guys need a new fashion consultant!
  6. Stage Effects? This is where it makes up for all it lacks. There are too many to mention.
  7. Wild Instrumental solo? VERY cool synth riff.
  8. Storyline? It has one, although it is hard to find amonst all the hype. I think it's got something to do with getting one's life back on course.
  9. Cool Automobile? A Corvette with leopard print fenders and dalmation/zebra print interior comes crashing through a wall.
  10. Sunglasses? They are all wearing them at some point. The lead pulls out a pair in the last chorus and puts them on in that "I'm too cool for words" style.
Submitted by: Daniel Raffaele
Buggles's, "Video Killed the Radio Star"
  1. Babes? The woman in the tube.
  2. Poofy Hair? Definitely.
  3. Torn Clothing? Nope.
  4. Cheesy Keyboards? Yes. Very cheesy. Guys piano-synching
  5. At Least One Change of Clothing? Actually, there are about 3.
  6. Stage Effects? A whole lot of explosions.
  7. Wild Instrumental solo? Kind of. There's some at many various points in the song.
  8. Storyline? Kind of.
  9. Cool Automobile? No.
  10. Sunglasses? Yes. The lead singer wears them throughout the video.
Submitted by: Laslo Denitrix
Songs beginning with: [Index] [A] [B] [C] [D] [E] [F] [G] [H] [I] [J] [K] [L] [M] [N] [O] [P] [Q] [R] [S] [T] [U] [V] [W] [X] [Y] [Z] [misc]
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